Let me first say that no cinema going experience is complete without jalapenos and crisp nachos. It is the starter to the main feature, the complement to the trailers and a prime way of dissolving out of life into fantasy. Hot dogs and popcorn are for the misguided seeking pleasure; killer nachos will open your mind to the truth. Let us begin.
UGC Cinemas
Awaiting review.
UCI Cinemas
£2.75 (medium) for a triangular shaped dish with nachos, salsa, and jalapenos. Choice between medium and large, salsa or cheese, and whether jalapenos are needed or not. Nachos are of decent proportion but lack salt and taste bland. Jalapenos are seedless (this is a bad thing) and lack character or power. But neither of these come anywhere near the salsa, which was like a pureed tin of tomatos with added water. Horrifying. 2/10
Ster Century
Need to be sampled again but salsa and nachos were fairly average and tasty - jalapenos were too limp to recommend the dish, however. 5/10
Warner Village
The cream of the crop - both cheese and salsa are hot with plenty of flavour (and you can get a bit of both), nachos are large with good texture, and jalapenos are mind blowingly hot. Enough to have you streaming by the end of the trailers, which is precisely what we're looking for. 8/10
I think we must consume. This is an important issue and first hand experience is essential to providing the public service. I have no fear of the nachos of beyond. I shall stand tall against their poor tomato salsa, their widdly peppers. Aha.
Well, I went a bit capito-globalistic and ate at McDonalds... and oddly, didn't feel hungry afterwards. So no nachos for moi. Must be something wrong with the world.
with good nachos!
